RE 4 + co-op - survival horror + uncomfortable African sterotypes = Resident Evil 5, and I'm ok with that

So I've been spending the past week or so working through Resident Evil 5 with my boy TMac21 and I have to say, I've been enjoying myself tremendously, even if the lucky bastard did call first dibs on Sheva.

The game has been stirring up an enormous amount of controversy over game quality and genre shifts (better than 4? Do we like the hardcore action?), accusations of racism, and downloadable content. Well, my gentle snowflakes, I have some thoughts on all of these topic so light up a fat one and lets get down to it.

Ok, so is Resident Evil 5 good? Plain and simple, yes, it's the shit. You can get a basic idea of what the game is like by reviewing my highly scientific formula above. Is it better than Resident Evil 4? No, but not many games could be. RE 5 bears of the heavy burden of coming on the heels of one of the most well received, exhilarating, shit-you-pants video games ever made. Given that it's also the latest in one of the most beloved series of all time and you can see it's got some pretty big boots to fill. Still, RE 5 really only fills these boots up about half way. To me, this game feels more like RE 4.5. Beyond co-op, there are no significant changes to the way is played. The story here feels the weakest by far, but at least you've got your shotgun and lots of African zombies to blow away.

Which brings us to the racism claims. Earl Ofari Hutchinson wrote that "the racist game reinforces the worst of the worst ancient stereotypes against and about Africans" on the Huffington Post while Seth Schiesel of the New York Times began his review by simply stating that RE 5 "is not a racist game." While I will definitively go on the record to say that Resident Evil is not racist, there are still alot of very uncomfortable racial and cultural aspects to this game. Basically every locale you go to is a shithole. You start off in a shanty town and as you wander in you pass many residents who are mostly lazing about, or standing around beating a some kind of slack. No one is really doing any work or being productive. Then there is a fact that you are a white, American man violently slaughtering African villagers. However, Schiesel makes the point that

'When you are in control of the action the racial or ethnic appearance of your enemies simply stops mattering. The basic mechanics of moving, shooting, using cover, solving puzzles, employing weapons properly and understanding the overall environment are universal, no matter whether the enemies are aliens or Nazis or zombies or gangsters or any of the other categories we use to denote “acceptable to kill."'

True dat. Still, that rationale doesn't make me feel better about breaking open villagers clay housewares, literally pillaging their jewels and valuables, and then turning around and selling these items to upgrade and rearm myself so I can kill even more natives. That's pretty messed up. Also unsettling are the more primitive zombie villagers wielding spears, tribal masks, and enormous tiki style shields. Again, probably not racist, but certainly unsettling.

And not terrifying, either. One of my biggest gripes with RE 5 is that it isn't scary at all. Not even a little bit. I've seen episosdes of America's Next Top Model that chill me more than this game. And that's sad for me. I vividly remember being enthralled and scared shitless wandering around the mansion in the original Resident Evil. My stomach was always twisted into a contorted knot dealing with zombie dogs crashing through windows, the ominous squish-squish noise coming from around the corner, and trying to ration those ink ribbons! God those ink ribbons! Now, playing Resident Evil 5, it's exciting, even thrilling, when you and your partner are surrounded by monsters, but that sense of dread is just not there. Also always having someone that's got your back (and chattering away in your ear if playing online) really takes away the fear that the feeling of isolation lent to the previous games. For me this is RE 5's biggest con. Hopefully 6 will go back to it's roots with some bad ass survival horror.

All this doesn't change the fact that it's still extremely fun to explode zombie heads from well place rifle shots. And by this I mean the play mechanics are exactly the same as every other RE game. Many people complain about the fact you cannot move and shoot at the same time, but I for one love this quirk of the RE series. It adds tension and excitement to the game, and is something of a RE calling card. One I hope the team keeps forever. As I said, RE 5 is still a great game and the co-op mode, while taking the series in an entirely different direction is a blast. I've been playing online co-op with my buddy Tommy and it's just plain fun. The camaraderie, sharing ammo, watching each other's backs, and even nailing your partner with a well deserved stun rod hit can't be beat. Still, Capcom could've done so much more with the two player mechanic. I LOVED the chapter where one character had to defenselessly hold a lantern while the other protected him or her to get through an pitch black cave. A lot of the two player specific stuff takes on the "ok, let's pull both these levers at the same time and see what happens" variety, and it's nothing special.

Finally, there has been more controversy over Capcom charging $4.99 for downloadable content that will allow for several additional multiplayer modes. My take? It's capitalism. Which can shit on you sometimes. And this time, it's shitty. Even worse, Christian Svensson, vice president of Strategic Planning & Business Development for Capcom called gamers for being whiny bitches (which they can be).

"This is the part where I get to say "BS"," he wrote on the Capcom forums. "RE5 is well worth every penny of $60. A huge game, with tons of replay value, loads of unlockables, new weapons, co-op, mercenaries mode, etc. If any game warrants its price point, it's RE5. Prior to the announcement of the Versus mode, no one complained they weren't getting their money's worth with the initial release because it packs TONS of value because it is an amazing game. So if people were already satisfied with what the package had, when we offer MORE, why is it people feel they've been somehow cheated? If you don't find value in our secondary offerings, the choice is simple, don't purchase it. If you do find it valueable (and we hope you do) please do buy it and enjoy it." Whatever. I probably will, but you're a dirty dildo.

Overall, I give Resident Evil 5 a

Bioshock 2 announced; my excitement is negligible

Game Informer's latest cover story broke news of the sequel to one of this generation's most beloved IPs, Bioshock. Now, it seems most people out there had a lot more love for the underwater distopian shoot-em-up than I did, but even so, it seems some folks are concerned as to the direction the new title will be taking. Tracy John, an intern at MTV.com posted an interesting article on his reaction to the cover story here, and I have some thoughts of my own.

The biggest reveal of the GI cover story was that this go around, you'll be playing as a Big Daddy, Rapute's hulking deep sea divers on steroids peacekeepers. These are the alpha dogs of the Bioshock universe and one of John's qualms was it wouldn't be exciting if you felt like Superman. Indeed, Game Informer reports that "average splicers only pose a threat to you in large numbers; alone, they barely even rate a glance." Ho hum, sounds boring to me. Actually, sounds plodding, since it's clear developer 2K Marin will want to keep you busy, probably by constantly throwing room after room of splicer groups at you. I also agree with John that trying to make the player feel like a Big Daddy is problematic. They are lumbering beasts, and although they could be surprisingly past in BS 1, they are still bulky and ungraceful. Personally, it doesn't appeal to me to play as some 400 pound behemoth whose walk shakes the ground they walk upon. However, I can imagine I'm in the minority on this.

this time, you'll be on the other side of that diving helmet

My biggest problem with BS 2 is that it just seems like too much of the same, and rather stressful. You mind as well call it Bioshock 1.1 since you ended BS 1 doning a Big Daddy suit and protecting Little Sisters, just like what seems to be the case in the sequel. I found it extremely stressful to protecting the Little Sisters from savage mutants as she extracted Adam from corpses. Perhaps this is what 2K intended, but it was an unenjoyable feeling of stress.

Also to file under the heading of Been There Done That is setting. First, we're back in Rapture, the failed dystopian underwater city. It's ten years later, but it doesn't really look like much has changed. The dark, dingy, depressing environs of Rapture really weighed on me by the end of the first game and honestly I don't feel like spending another 20 hours in the exact same gloomy environment. While 2K Marin promises new areas to explore, they also stress that "there are certainly going to be elements of Rapture that you'll see and recognize, if not fully intact locations." Wow. Double yawn. I became bored quickly of all the similar locations in the first Bioshock and I can't say I'm stoked to be revisiting the same drab locales. John at MTV.com suggested a flashback level that showcases Rapture before all the wheels came off and I think this is fantastic idea. Rapture is such a richly imagined place and it's a shame you never get to see it in it's former glory. Please 2K, give us some variety - there is only so much leaky metal I can take.

Still another idea that feels tired that will seem to make a reappearance in the BS 2 is the "moral decision" concerning the Little Sisters. Basically when you kill a Big Daddy that is protecting a Little Sister in the first game, you could choose to either "harvest" (extract some kind of slug from the Sister thereby killing her and making you more powerful - yeah I never quite understood what was going on there) or "save" her. The main problem for me with this mechanic is that quite soon into the game I realized it didn't make a fuck's worth of difference which option I chose. If I chose "save" every time, Tenenbaum, the adoptive mother of the Sisters would send you a "present" basically filled with the same goodies you would get by harvesting the Sisters. Maybe the standard mode I played on was too easy, but I also never felt underpowered and therefore never was really hungering for more Adam; it felt more like a bonus than a necessity.

One thing I DO love about BS 2 is the Big Sister. Apparently she's one of the original Little Sisters who comes back to Rapture with a bad attitude and a giant fucking needle attached to her arm. She also wears a cage that the Little Sisters ride around in and have attached pink ribbons too. Adorable. While the idea of her being this all-powerful, unkillable huntress constantly tracking your ass down also seems like it might be unenjoyably stressful, overall she strikes me as one badass addition to the Bioshock universe.

Maybe I'm being unnecessarily harsh on Bioshock too. I guess it's just that I thought that the original game was a overrated and the sequal seems like too much more of the same. Still, the game is many months away and 2K may have a bunch more tricks up its sleeve. Here's hoping.

My new blog

Hey bloggin buddies! I'm pondering starting up a new blog based on gaming with a major gay twist, and I'm looking for a name. It's going to include the word "gaymer" cause that's just hot. I also am notoriously hard to please when it comes to games so I was considering something like grouchygamer.com or grumpygamer.com. What do you think? Please vote on the side bar! Any other suggestions?? Leave a comment. xo JB

so what about gay and grumpy?

Stuff I dig: Em & Lo

Em & Lo.com
Em & Lo are two sassy ladies who know a thing or two about sex. They are kind of like your more experienced, sexually empowered, always-fabulous cousin who sort of makes you feel bad about yourself but you don't really mind because she tells you how to give guys an out-of-this-world blowjob. Yeah, that kind of cousin.

Em & Lo dish on all the do's, don'ts and do-it-faster-harder-and-deepers of the dating, marriage and most of all, sex game. Referring to themselves as the "Emily Posts of the modern bedroom," the lovely ladies provide advise on sex, sexual health, pop culture updates, and dozens of other fun features. Oh, and I'm a featured contributor on their popular Wiseguys segment, so you can read about what I think of small penises and valentine's day presents. What could be better than that?

The Case of the Mysterious Magenta Light and Other Tales

Starring Jonathan Balthaser and Courtney Benson

So my dear friend Courtney, with whom I've had too many misadventures to count, surprised me last week by stopping by Brooklyn on her way back to school in D.C. We had some fun! After a hearty lunch at Yemen Cafe, we took a stroll down the promenade and took some nice pics. Afterwards, crazy old Chipsy just could not help herself from licking the Statue of Liberty.Walking back, we came upon a mysterious magenta light bathing the sidewalk and we couldn't figure out where it was coming from! Neither of us had ever seen anything so. . .peculiar. It wasn't reflecting off anything, yet it didn't seem to be coming directly from anywhere either. Was someone toying with us? The game was afoot! We decided to go about investigating the mystery like proper detectives by tagging and documenting the evidence, as well as writing down clues. Just as I went to tag and photograph the mysterious light, it dissappeared. And so did the sun! Ah ha! Our first, and sadly, as it came to be, only clue.

The elusive and baffling light toyed with us for a good 10 minutes

Undeterred by its dissappearance, I tagged the spot where the light had once been.We waited for the light to reappear and for more clues, but the trail had gone cold. We were perplexed, but it was getting chilly out and we decided it was time to head home.
We headed back to my pad and read through some old notebooks and journals of mine from Madrid and I was crying laughing remembering one particularly wild night in Toledo.

I love hanging out with Chipsy 'cause we can just shoot the shit for hours and be ridiculously silly and gossipy for hours and miles. Also outrageous things eventually happen to us and when they don't, we just make something up. Plus, we have a deep well of memories to draw on and drink deeply from. Ah, refreshing.

It's not all a bed of roses though. . .I still wake up screaming in the middle of the night thinking of that unholy magenta light. . .

Mr. Out of Bounds 2009

Last Thursday Rick and I attended the fabulous Mr. Out of Bounds contest at Stonewall. The contest was open to any athlete who belonged to a gay New York sports league and it was a "contest" to see who was the gayest? hottest? jock in New York. I couldn't really tell, but it was basically a bunch of hotties strutting around in their undies so I was alright with it. Also, it benefited the wonderful Trevor Project that operates a 24 hour gay suicide prevention hotline, I could feel less guilty about spending money on drinks. MTG's very own Patrick So was a contestant and won some auxiliary prize (I can't remember which one). He got a hug as his trophy!
I had never been to Stonewall and it was really fun! The house was packed and there were lots of cute boys hanging out. Two random people gave me drink tickets and there was just a great mood about the party. I ran into two random people: James Lecene, and actor I "worked with" (no thats not supposed to sound dirty, I sold concessions at a show he was in) in Provincetown several years ago and Arjuna, the ex of a roomate of my ex, Joe. Weird, small world. A bunch of the tennis boys were out to support our boy Patrick, and get toasted.
Afterwards, Sean, Tod, Rick and I went for pizza (which I abstained from, sticking to my fitness diet!)After that we headed over to Duplex for some fabulous local caberet singing. I actually got pretty hammered but it was a super fun and sexy night.

Our ever changing summer plans. . .

So, our summer plans are in flux. We are in a (hopefully) unique position where both of us will be free during the summer, me with no job, and Rick on vacation. Rick has to teach until the end of June, so our first plan was to head to Provincetown, hopefully get a job or two waitering, cocktail waitering, etc. and living the good life on the gay, gay beach. I had visions of dancing the night away with drag queens, biking shirtless down Commercial St. and checking out all the hotties, taking Kippy for runs on the beach, and just live simply with Rick.

Will we go? Its future is in limbo.

However, Rick was invited to apply to be a mentor for the New York City Teaching Fellows, NYC's crash course for new teachers. It's a sweet gig that pays $50/hour, and Rick knows someone on the selection committee so he has a great shot at making it. At first I was upset that our Ptown plans would be dashed, and I will still be miserable if I have nothing to do all day during July.

HOWEVER, since we will still have the majority of August with nothing to do, we are finally going to take our honeymoon, one year later. So, our plan as of now is a trip to Europe! Our itinerary changes daily, but this is how it's stacking up so far: We have roughly 3 weeks, (NYC still has not published when school will start in the fall, and I'm hoping it's more like 4 weeks) so we are basically planing the first half in cities and the second half in naturey places (read: the beach). So check out the map.

View Larger Map

Were planning on flying to Copenhagen, where we'll send our one year anniversary! From there take the train to Berlin for 3 or 4 days. Then it's off to Praha so Rick can reconnect with his Czech roots where we'll stay with my old friend Saro from highschool. Hopefully we'll meet some nice Bel Ami boys there as well. Next its off to Vienna for some wiener schnitzle and a drink at a fabulous cafe. We'll eventaully bid auf wiedersehen to Austria and boun giorno to Italy when we get to Venice. From there we'll head east, bumming our way down the Croatian coast, hopefully ending up in Split. We'll then cross the Adriatic Sea and make our way to Rome, where we'll fly out of. Sound ambitious? Maybe. But as I said, it's a very preliminary plan, and certainly some things will change.

Do you guys have advice? Suggestions? Places we simply can't miss or an amazing hotel or secret B&B that we'll love? Let me know!!